Thursday, July 20, 2006

Salt of the earth

Max is on a kick lately. He is totally against salt and anything related to salt, which is a little unreasonable since everything has salt in it.
“Mom, I think I’ll just have fruit for lunch today, since I had salt yesterday.”“Max salt is good for you, your body needs it,” I tried to explain but he would have no part of it.“Mom, I’m sorry but I don’t want to die.”
Max is a very literal boy.
And he’s very afraid of disease.
His dad is the guilty culprit, telling Max how bad salt was when huge quantities of it are ingested.Max took this to heart (no pun intended).
So he has been on a campaign to rid his body of salt. And the bodies of his family, too.“Danny, you shouldn’t eat that. It’s bad for you,” Max said before his brother was ready to attack a bologna sandwich.
He even grabbed the bag of Cheetoes right out of my hand.
But of course, he thought Oreos were OK. Until I explained that salt is everywhere, even in sweet things.
“There’s no getting away from it, just like soy,” I told him. We had went through the pain of anti-soy products when we found out Danny was allergic to the subversive stuff.And of course Danny had to announce it everyone. “Well, if that has soy in it then I can’t eat it.”
So rather than let him starve himself to death, my husband and I had to sit him down and give him the “a world without soy is like a world without candy” talk.
So now Danny embraces soy, but he still asks me to read the ingredients on labels.
So I guess my kids are somehow related to Woody Allen.
They also have an almost in humanlike aversion to soda pop. They act like it’s alcohol.“No, no thanks I’m riding my bike home,” they tell their friends.
When they see me drinking a pop, their expressions are ones of puzzlement, as to how I could drink something so putrid.All of this works out well for me right? Wrong.
I almost wish my boys were a little more like other children. When we got to birthday parties or whatever, inevitably there are sodas and a host of other “high-risk” foods.
Max usually ends up asking for water and carrots with ranch dressing. And Danny always wants milk. Always.
People look at them as though they were from outer space. Including me.
I grew up in a home where Coca Cola and Oreos were considered part of the basic food groups.
Funny how life works.
Now presenting your wonderful freebie, I had a preview posted on here to show what all you will be receiving but deleted it and now I can't post pics for some reason. GRRRR. Anyway here's a stupid link to what you'll get
and you can actually get it at the link below.
Thanks and leave LOVE!! *SINGING* I want to feel the love toniiiiiiiight!

EDIT: Almost forgot my shameless plug *GO TO 2BScrapped or BAD THINGS WILL HAPPEN! Pass this on to 10 people you know, quickly, no time to lose!!! Don't break the chain!!!!*


Vicki said...

Thanks so much for the new kit!

Amy's Images said...

Steph, what are you doing to those poor kids... I mean seriously, what kid goes to a part and asks for a carrot, milk and water? That is freaky, and the pop thing... wow they would definitely call me 'That Amy Thing' for sure if they met me... pop (cola) is a food group for me.

Amy's Images said...

I mean party, I know how you are on this spelling thing. :P

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